Test Video (Just a crappy little video)

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So my dad’s on vacation so I get to play around with his computer. I had to use the speakers from my computer monitor and have the picture in the other monitor which was a bit bizarre (also, only one computer can have wifi at the time). Finally I used the pen tablet in my lap to do most of the video because there is no desk space for a mouse (especially the crappy mouse I have).

Video shot at kits beach.

Unknowledgeable Tutorials: Masking & Background Blurring

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Welcome to the first instalment of Jen teaches what she just learnt…on Google. In other words, a tutorial from someone who doesn’t know what the hell she is doing. Yay! I looked it up on Google and then did it and then lived to upload it and write about it! Previous to that experience, I didn’t make much experience with masks. The good thing about masks is that you can disable them and (sort of) move them around but I don’t know a ton about them.

Disclaimer: the writer of the author does not really know what is she is doing and is doing this for the first time after looking it up on Google and using a range of techniques found on various websites (although she didn’t actually look up painting the masks…that just came to her in an obvious way). Seriously.  Also, there may be an easier and/or better way to do this but the writer just doesn’t know it.

This will work in Photoshop Elements (9+), Photoshop (any…I think. ), probably GIMP or anything that supports layer masking. But I don’t use GIMP since it seems to take me forever to do anything in it!

We will turn this

into this

Poetry should be read out loud!

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Yes, I know.

I should really have someone reading my poetry in my videos. But I’m not doing it (you wouldn’t be able to understand me anyway….probably.).

I don’t have any friends, let alone any talented friends to ask.

I don’t have a fanbase of any sort that might be talented and may want to do it.

Besides I have an idea of how it should be read that someone else may not follow.

So it’s silent. Except for music. And the odd sound effect or two.  It’s my writing so there’s no recording of it floating around (especially before I release it).


All hobbies and no day jobs

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There are things, many thing that I enjoy doing. I like making stuff. I like making attempts at nearly all forms of digital media even though I don’t know what I’m doing much the time. I like making websites (and blogs, although I find WordPress much harder to customize because I don’t know PHP). I like making videos.  I like taking photos of anything but people and drawing/digital painting (although I’m not very good at any). I like writing poetry and creative non-fiction.

But I can’t see myself doing any of these for a living. It’s not like I don’t think it’s possible (okay, being a full-time non-performing poet…that probably isn’t possible especially if you want a pony like me) or that I don’t like it or anything like that.

It’s because I don’t think I’m good enough (for my own/others creative projects). Or alternatively for commercial projects, I can’t imagine working with clients. (Because I am not a nice or friendly person….or some think anyway as well as myself).

Do I think I’m a good writer? It seems to depend on the day. Do I think I’m a good designer or artist – often not, especially there’s a huge gap between my internal vision and what I actually end up with (though that may be more of a technical lack of skills though since I was never taught how to use the software).

What about being a blogger? The things I write don’t have mass appeal (clearly, according to my stats…which I swear is usually just me….I just use the stats from WordPress.com/Jetpack). I have very little traffic on this blog. Very little.

My other things don’t fare so well either. I have hardly any traffic on any of my videos or really, anything really. Besides, I don’t make things that a wide audience likes. I’m not a good internet personality. I don’t have a comic or anything (if I did it would probably be about ponies, and not the my little pony kind. Maybe dressage ponies hahaha!)

I like hiking and horses (and ponies) too. But I know those will always be a hobby. I suck at everything with horses (aside from petting noses) it seems sometimes….sigh. I don’t know about my stance with horses. Yes, it’s madly expensive and dangerous but it seems like I’ve been riding too long (10 years) to give it up now. As if they have become part of me, somehow.

I want a pony when I grow up. I said it like I’m 5. I wish I was kidding…. (or a horse or something in-between…but I do fit at least large ponies.) I think I need to get out of this insanely expensive city! It’s just not going to happen here.

Also, it doesn’t help that pretty much all my hobbies are expensive. Like horses. And media arts…with the hardware and if you were to be fully legal and use all the fancy software (Adobe creative cloud is $50/month and that’s very well worth it if you earn income from it, but not for the hobbyist that might crack out an Adobe CS program or two or three a few times per month for personal projects!)….and upgrades as technology marches on and….and not to mention, equipment (have you seen prices for good cameras? –  DSLR, Mirrorless Interchangeable Lens Cameras/ and Professional Compacts all cost an arm and an leg….in some cases a limb for the body and limbs for the lenses  Ha!) and….I don’t know about anything. My hobbies also include living and being in existence. Good hobby eh? When living is NOT a hobby and living becomes a job, then there may be a problem…(slavery anyone?).

Anyway that’s my first world rant for today.

I am full of existential dread at the moment.

I have lots of hobbies. Unfortunately, I either suck at them or they are just plan not lucrative.

Good News and Bad News

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So previously I got locked out of my blog. (Said my username didn’t exist…even though I’m the only user and I’m the admin and it’s self hosted….). At the time I was also locked out of my hosting panel so I had no access to the database.

The Good News
I regained access to my hosting Cpanel today (finally after days not being able to access it…it is a free host so there’s not really any support per se…). After fiddling around in the wp_users table of my database my phpMyAdmin  (not a good place to play, really) with some Googling (even though my solution didn’t come from Google or the WordPress forums  it came from dumb logic…maybe I should change the user_login to my login), I finally got my login to work again. I have no idea what happened that made it stop working but now it works again! So we’re back in action and I don’t have to move right away!

I fixed it though! I ventured into the database and my blog didn’t break and I fixed it! Somehow. I’m pretty proud of myself.  (Considering my database management skills are kind of…nill.)

The Bad News
I can’t get my back up database (.sql) to work but that may be just me (the files may require some manual editing). It keeps bugging me about my comment tables and such with “#1046 – No database selected”. It seems to be a common problem but I am not versed enough (i.e. not at all) in PHP and MySQL to figure it out quickly.

Luckily there are other ways to restore a blog (though I would have to start with a new install…of everything…).

The Moon Knows Solitude (video)

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Poem text: “The Moon Knows Solitude”

She hovers there in the dark sky
as I wander alone in the lonely night
wondering what I’m doing here
but the moon, she too knows solitude

Not just in one of her shy phases
hiding and peering in her celestial curtains
but she is too, all alone

Maybe Earth gives her company,
the flow of the tides
and as the awe of humanity

But she is lonely in her orbit
her dark side looking on to
the great planets with many moons,
and the cozy families too

But the moon – there’s no one like her around here
no other celestial orb to share her Earth
except for the odd asteroid (and space crap)
to keep her company every now and then

I stare into the night
sharing the moment with the moon
following her silver stare
and now here we are
less alone in our mutual friend,


I wrote this over the weekend, thinking about solitude and then somehow thinking about the moon. In many ways it reflects us both I guess.

Surprisingly, I have little to say about this poem other than that I was too impatient to let it linger before revising it.


Written, Designed & Animated by me.

Additional sound credits

Freesound credits (that got me flagged on Vimeo)





Locked Out of My Blog!

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I’m actually locked out of my blog admin.
And the hosting panel is a mess.

So we shall see what happens….

I only have POST BY EMAIL access to my blog right now. 
I CANNOT edit posts or pages (or I would have edited my original poem post and updated my portfolio)

I also CANNOT moderate comments, modify the theme or basically do anything else on my blog but post to it.

I do have FTP access but no app or client access. Cpanel is a mess and I cannot access phpMyAdmin,
I seem to be getting my nightly backups from BackWPup. I’m currently looking at free hosting options (and eventually cheap). I have post to email access with the plugin, Jetpack.

I’m going to move my blog soon but my domain will stay the same. Performance may differ though. I was going to redesign my blog again but it turns out that I have more important things to do.


Geeking out on moon names

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Uranus is a sucky planet name. (Scientists have found a spot on Uranus…hahaha!). Herschel should have really just have called it George (the original name was Georgium Sidus) Seriously. So to make up for that Uranus has AWESOME moon names! (Well, to me anyway)

Their names are (ordered by name, not by location…it’s easier this way): Ariel, Umbriel, Belinda (Pope, Rape of the Lock), Titania, Oberon, Puck (Midsummer’s Night Dream), Miranda, Caliban, Sycorax, Prospero, Setebos, Stephano, Trinculo, Francisco, Ferdinand (The Tempest), Cordelia (King Lear), Ophelia (Hamlet), Bianca (The Taming of the Shrew), Cressida (Troilus and Cressida), Desdemona (Othello), Juliet, Mab (Romeo and Juliet), Portia (The Merchant of Venice), Rosalind (As You Like It), Margaret (Much Ado About Nothing), Perdita (The Winter’s Tale), Cupid (Timon of Athens)

All from Shakespeare except for Alexander Pope’s Rape of the Lock. Yes, there’s an Ariel in the Tempest too so I guess it does double duty (I think they are both very light sort of spiritual being anyway). Most moon names are named after various Gods or something but Uranus’ moons are the only ones named after literature. Herschel named the first moons Titania and Oberon, the logic being that a planet named for a God of the sky, it should have airy names for its moons. The naming trend has continued with the source material rather then airy spirits though.

I have just geeked out on moon names. Wow.