Or at at least was.

Christmas used to be a special time, a magical time. Something to look forward every year. A tradition. But time has passed, the mystique eroded and the traditions came to an end. It used to be the “thing” every year, we’ll go to my grandma house to prepare the tree and on Christmas day, set out the toys we pull out every year including the Rudolph stuffie I got when I was four (where is that thing now, anyway?) open stockings, presents, mingle with family, push a giant snowball across the street with my cousin (okay, so that was one year)…  I remember being a young child, transfixed by the lights.  But that was Christmas. And then it ended. My grandparents sold their house and my grandma retired from christmas. Since then, Christmas Day….well, it hasn’t been that much. But this is the first year that Christmas Day has had relatively absolutely nothing.

We have no Christmas tree.  I’ve begged for years but still the house is unadorned by Christmas, as if the Christmas magic has left here long ago. The bells no longer have their ring.

Of course, it didn’t help matters that I was more or less sick this Christmas thanks to my mom so my nose has been feeling like an never-ending well of snot.  (By the way: a cold is NOT a great gift) and lately I haven’t had the motivation to do much hence the lack of of all projects. I still have to modify my other site for mobile and I haven’t even done that! I took out my pen tablet….but I can’t think of anything to draw. I’ve been mostly lying in bed most of the week – either playing with my phone or sleeping. Ugh.

Another year has passed. I can’t believe it. Maybe next year will be more Christmasy. Maybe next year will have more Christmas Cheer. Maybe next year I will get a pony…okay, maybe not…I think I will need to buy my own damn pony lol but it’s in the plan. Some people dream and plan of getting a house and a dream and plan of getting a pony (or horse) ha!

Anyway, today is Christmas but it might as well be any other day. The magic is elusive. But I think it’s somewhere, just hiding, not obliterated.

Merry Christmas….or Sickmas I should say. Or whatever it’s left of it.

Here’s a few Christmas/Winter Songs for the heck of it…y I’m on a minor Hem obsession at the moment (sorry people on mobile, not sure if it will work…go here instead)….just to be a bit more festive (never mind that most these songs are original Christmasy or Wintery songs by indie artists…plus the internet Christmas classic, creative-commons licensed Chiron Beta Prime lol).

I might do a music post later. I’ve been meaning to anyway…